i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
