ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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