i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
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