I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize