would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
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