that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize