I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize