Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
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she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
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So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
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