people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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