erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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