Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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