Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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