belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
