I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
