so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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