I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize