What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
