Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize