sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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