i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
