Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
