the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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