Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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