We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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