woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize