Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
