dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
