party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
