so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
It's rum buckets o'clock
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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