I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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