you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
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