found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I can't turn off my feet"
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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