ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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