You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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