How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
