SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
