I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
