i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
