is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
