yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
