Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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