I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
