New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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