I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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