He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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