When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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