her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
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Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
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Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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