now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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