I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize
