is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
